Please ask for clarification, if needed. This is obviously a very personal subject for a Manifold market. If you feel uncomfortable taking part, please don't. It's just an experiment.

I haven't met any new people in years. My depression and the pandemic played their part. I now have hardly any social contacts besides close family and professional relationships, like my therapist who keeps raising the issue with me.

It's not that I don't like being alone, I do. But it's a strange addiction. Over time, this invisible vacuum of loneliness developed around me. It's something I can barely grasp, something I rarely even think about. Maybe I avoid thinking about it and more often than not I somehow manage to forget about it, just for a while. But it's always there.

I've noticed how this vacuum has changed my personality. To some extent, I have forgotten how to deal with people. I can spend days thinking about trivial interactions. Have I done something wrong? Does this person dislike me? I'm so preoccupied with what the other person thinks of me that it's hardly possible for me to understand how they are really feeling and what's going on in their own lifes. That sometimes makes me think that I'm too self-centered to be around people, but if I'm honest, I have to admit to myself that I really do care about other people, I'm just not very good at it.

I can't say that I'm yet fully committed to this goal of "meeting new people". But I may be ready soon.